The Insomniac's Reassurance
by Mollz33
Summary: Feliciano smiled softly and brought his hand up to cup the side of Ludwig's cheek, wiping away a stray tear. "Sweetie." Ludwig met Feliciano's eyes. "I'm not worried about you hurting me. I've never been worried that you would hurt me."


Ludwig couldn't sleep. Given what activity he'd spent the past 3 hours doing, it was rather surprising, too. He and his Italian lover, Feliciano, had spent the night making beautiful, passionate love to each other.

The night had started with Ludwig preparing a wonderful dinner for two, waiting impatiently for Feliciano to come home, who had been in Italy for a week because of his boss. So, in a romantic and desperate attempt to keep his mind off the minute hand on his grandfather clock, Ludwig cooked a creamy alfredo pasta dish with chopped mushrooms and chives for Feliciano and bratwurst and beef stew for himself. Unfortunately for Ludwig, cooking the food and setting the table didn't take nearly as much time as he had initially expected, mostly because Ludwig is so used to having to schedule an extra hour to get things done because of Feliciano. So, Ludwig set the food on a low simmer to keep them warm and began making shortbread for the strawberry shortcake he decided to make.

All-in-all, the dinner and desert only took an hour and a half to make. Which turned out to be just enough time, because just as Germany was pulling the shortcake from the oven, Ludwig heard the front door open and close. He smiled softly as a pair of thin, familiar arms wrapped around his middle and a kiss was placed on the back of his neck. "Ve~, Luddy, what smells so good?" a very familiar voice spoke into Ludwig's ear. Ludwig set down the shortcake and turned around and wrapped his arms around Feliciano's waist tightly as Feliciano moved his to Ludwig's neck. He buried his nose in the soft auburn hair of the lover he had been missing so much, breathing in Feliciano's distinct earthy yet spicy scent. Instantly, a welcomed warmth filled Ludwig, a feeling the German hadn't even been aware he had missed. Ludwig moved his hand so that it was rubbing small, sensual circles on Feliciano's lower back, causing the Italian to mewl and rub his nose underneath his German lover's chin.

"Feliciano, I've missed you so," Ludwig spoke softly. "I made us dinner. I figured that you would be tired after your journey." A rosy blush made it's way onto Ludwig's cheeks as he carefully picked Feliciano up, one hand holding his back while the other cupped Feliciano's bum. He walked them into the dinning room and set his Italian lover in the seat at the table he had prepared earlier. He left and returned shortly after with their dinner, serving Feliciano first and pouring him a glass of red wine. As they ate, Ludwig asked Feliciano how his trip had been and how things had gone with his boss. Easily, Feliciano told Ludwig every detail of every day while he had been gone, taking lots of time to tell his German lover about the delicious pasta dish he had while in Venice. Which led to Feliciano going on and on about how much he loved the dish Ludwig had prepared for him even more because the meal was made with love, especially for him.

It wasn't long after dinner before one thing led to another and the two lovers found themselves in the bedroom, making passionate love. Ludwig lustfully thrusting in and out, making Feliciano scream in pleasure every time Ludwig grazed his prostate. The glorious sex-induced sounds coming from Feliciano were like a drug to Ludwig. Every gasp, every pant, every cry was like the most beautiful sound and made Ludwig addicted. Ludwig moved his hands from Feliciano's hips, one grabbing his wrists and pinning them above the Italian's head, the other stroking Feliciano in time. Feliciano let out a loud moan, inadvertently making Ludwig increase his pace. It wasn't long before the two came to their ends, Ludwig moaning Feliciano's name and Feliciano shouting Ludwig's.

Both breathing hard, Ludwig dropped down onto the spot next to Feliciano and quickly brought the small Italian close to his side. The Italian snuggled his face onto Ludwig's chest and with a slurred 'ti amo,' promptly fell asleep. Ludwig watched with amusement as a bit of drool left the corner of Feliciano's mouth. The German let out a yawn but realised that he didn't feel that tired. So he leaned on one hand and watched his small lover sleep. Once again, Ludwig was amazed to realise that he found another thing that he missed while Feliciano was gone: watching Feliciano sleep. His breath coming out short but starting to slow down into slow deep breaths. A warm feeling flooded his hole being as he looked over Feliciano's sleeping face. Honestly, how could Ludwig _not _love this man?

Said man who then rolled onto his back, one arm behind his head and the other stretched out by Ludwig's face, his legs spreading wide. The blanket covering Feliciano's body slipped off, leaving nothing hidden from Ludwig's eyes. So it wasn't long before Ludwig's eyes zeroed in on the bruises marking Feliciano's hips and wrists. Those little fingertip sized bruises laid across the Italian's lightly-toned body might as well be flashing bright red lights. It was like a fuse broke inside of Ludwig's mind. His blood ran cold and every thought process stopped. His little Italian lover was covered in bruises. He shakily lifted his right hand and ghosted it over one of the many bruises on Feliciano's body. They fit perfectly.

Ludwig stared, horror on his face, ignoring his blurring vision. _He_ had hurt his lovely Italian. _He _had caused harm upon him. It was _he _who was responsible for the small purple-blue marks on Feliciano's beautiful skin. Ludwig abruptly brought his hand back, his body beginning to shake. Salty tears began flowing down the German's face but he was too shocked to let out a sob. Ludwig had promised Feliciano, before they even became lovers, that he would always be there to keep Feliciano safe from harm. Time and time again, Ludwig would rescue the Italian when he was kidnapped and protect him during battles. Not once had Ludwig ever broke his promise to the Italian, until now. The very idea of Feliciano being hurt or in pain made every muscle in Ludwig tense up and his blood boil, wanting nothing but to find the one who harmed his lover and make them pay, slowly and painfully. But this time, it was his own fault. Ludwig had no one to blame but himself and that alone was pain enough.

Ludwig was so lost in his horror, that he failed to realise that he had woken Feliciano up. The auburn haired man slowly and sleepily blinked the sleep from his eyes. He had been dreaming that Ludwig and he had been overlooking the balcony on the second level of the Italian's house in Venice. The two had been sipping wine, and just before Feliciano woke up, Ludwig leaned down to kiss him. It was a relatively pleasant dream, so Feliciano was a bit miffed at waking up before the good stuff happened. Or at least, he would be miffed, if he hadn't caught the state his lover happened to be in.

Feliciano immediately realised that something wasn't right. "Luddy? Ludwig? What is it? Is everything ok?" he brought his hand and waved it lightly in front of Ludwig, trying to get a reaction out of his German lover. But Ludwig was so far off in his horror that he didn't even register the hand in front of him. Now, starting to panic, Feliciano put his hands on Ludwig's shoulders. "Ludwig, what is it?" But Ludwig continued to stare into oblivion. "Ludwig!" Feliciano shook his shoulders, now desperate to figure out what was wrong with his lover. "Ludwig! Ludwig please! Answer me!" Ludwig continued to stare on for a second or two, then slowly, ice cold eyes met worried chocolate brown. "F-f-Feli…?" A pale hand tentatively reached out for Feliciano but abruptly stopped short. Confused and somewhat hurt, Feliciano brought a hand to cup Ludwig's cheek, but Ludwig flinched away from the hand jumped backwards out of Feliciano's touch, leaving Feliciano very hurt and confused at this point. "L-Luddy?"

"No! D-don't come near me!" Ludwig cried. And for the first time, Feliciano froze. Not because of what Ludwig had said, but because of the raw, uncensored fear in Ludwig's eyes. There wasn't just a little bit, Feliciano saw, the fear was radiating off of the German. Immediately, Feliciano wanted to run to the German and comfort him, but had to fight down the urge after seeing Ludwig's reaction to simple gesture. Instead, Feliciano slowly leaned forward, wincing at the pain below his hips, so that he was facing the terrified German in front of him. 'Ludwig, my love, can't you please tell me what is wrong? I don't like seeing you hurt like this."

"I-I-I…" Ludwig took a shallow, shaky breath. "Feliciano, look at yourself! You're covered in bruises. Bruises that I caused! I hurt you!" Tears were pouring from his eyes, but Ludwig continued to stare horror-struck at the marks marring his lover's body. How did Feliciano allow him to hurt him? Why didn't he say anything? If he had been hurting him, Ludwig would've stopped immediately, not even a second though about it. Feliciano knew that, right? So then why did Feliciano allow him to hurt him? Was he afraid to say something? Was Feliciano afraid about hurting his feelings? Was the love they made one-sided for his own sake and not enjoyable to Feliciano? Would Feliciano leave him when he wakes up and discovers what he had done? The panic-induced thoughts continued to run through Ludwig's brain as he distantly watched Feliciano grew a confused look on his face, then brought his right wrist up to look at. His eyes grew wide for a second, but soon turned to examine the new marks upon his body that he had not even been aware were there. The marks were a dark purple, nearing black and covered all the way around his wrist, which he then brought up his left wrist and that too had the small purple-black mark as the other. Without thinking, Feliciano touched the mark on his left and winced at the dull pain that followed.

Suddenly, what Ludwig had said earlier came to Feliciano's mind, 'you're covered in bruises!' Feliciano brought a hand to touch the dull throb in the crevice of neck and collarbone, realising he had found another bruise. Continuing on his journey, Feliciano looked down and his eyes widened at the size of the bruises gracing his hips. They were in fact as large as a man's hand, Ludwig's hand. Feliciano didn't even need to touch the marks to know that they would hurt. Travelling lower, there were more bruises on his lower abs and a few tiny ones that dusted his inner thighs. Ludwig wasn't lying when he said that he was covered.

"…Wow…" Feliciano didn't mean to sound so meager, but the words left his mouth on their own accord. Sure, he's had bruises here and there and what's a hickey every now and then, but never has Feliciano been _covered_ in them before. In fact, if he wasn't so tired and sore, Feliciano might even be rather impressed. Putting two and two together, Feliciano realised the reason for Ludwig's behaviour. But going back to Ludwig, Feliciano noticed that his slip-of-the-tongue had a negative effect. A very, negative effect. Ludwig had moved to the edge of the bed and had his head buried in his hands. From where Feliciano was, he could see Ludwig's back shake, un-doubtly from crying.

Quietly, Feliciano scooted over to his very upset lover and placed a delicate hand on his shaky shoulder. Instantly, Ludwig tensed up and jumped away from the hand. "N-no! Don't touch me! Please!" Now there's a first, Feliciano dimly noted. Normally Ludwig would command, not say 'please.' But not deterred, Feliciano let out a knowing sigh, and gently hopped off the bed, a pained groan leaving his lips. Limping and trying to hold back moans of pain, Feliciano kneeled down in front of Ludwig. He gently but firmly placed his hands on Ludwig's knees. The blonde started away from the touch but Feliciano held on tight, letting his lover know that he wasn't getting away just yet. "Ludwig Beilschmidt, I want you took look me in the eyes." Feliciano commanded in warm but I-want-an-answer-so-no-more-of-this-silly-business voice. Slowly, Ludwig met his in-charge lover with sad, humiliated blue eyes.

"Good." Feliciano smiled warmly. "Now do you want to tell me what all this funny business is all about, hmm? You know that I love touching you, so why all of a sudden am I not allowed to?" A few stray tears fell from Ludwig's eyes, but the large nation took a deep shuddering breath. "F-Feliciano… I hurt you. I promised you that I would keep you safe from harm, but I've hurt you." Feliciano watched as Ludwig's eyes drifted from bruise to bruise. Lightly, the Italian rubbed his thumbs on Ludwig's thighs as he waited for Ludwig to look back up at his eyes. "Sweetie, you're really upset about this, aren't you?"

"How can I not be upset about this? I've physically harmed you, Feliciano! And I wasn't even aware I was hurting you!" Ludwig immediately became exasperated while Feliciano calmly listened to every word. "Feliciano… if I covered you in bruises without realising it… what if I hurt you in way that's even worse because I didn't know?" Ludwig made a deep sigh and dropped his gaze. "Feliciano…I couldn't live with myself… knowing I caused you harm."

Feliciano smiled softly and brought his hand up to cup the side of Ludwig's cheek, wiping away a stray tear. "Sweetie." Ludwig met Feliciano's eyes. "I'm not worried about you hurting me. I've never been worried that you would hurt me. And do you know why?" Feliciano smiled. Ludwig scoffed and muttered 'you used to run away in fear during the war because you were afraid I would punish you…' but gave Feliciano a look that said 'please just tell me before I go insane.' Pretending as if he hadn't heard the running away in fear comment, Feliciano stroked Ludwig's cheek once again simply stated, "because I know you love me." Ludwig stared incredulously at his lover. That was it? "Hmm, you don't believe me, do you?" Feliciano frowned and tilted his head. "It…it's not that I don't believe you…I just don't see how that could be suffice enough for you."

Smiling knowingly, (he's been doing that a lot lately) Feliciano withdrew his hand from Ludwig's cheek and folded his arms on the German's strong legs and rested his chin on his arms. "My silly sweetheart, how could love not be a sufficient enough answer?" Ludwig's face exploded in a shade of rosy red and stammered "w-well… I-I mean… love, it's… well. It's n-nice in all, but… I-I hardly see how that could be a strong enough reason not to harm another." Feliciano sighed, 'tsk tsk tsk, Luddy! You underestimate love! Love is stronger than you give it credit for. Just look at you and me! You're big and strong and are always there to protect me while I'm a coward, can't fight, and am easily taken advantage of. We may not seem like a perfect pair, but we still found a way to love each other deeply. That's what makes love so amazing, Luddy."

Ludwig stared down at his lover for a second or two before slowly breaking into a loving smile. He lifted his hand and moved a stray hair away from the Italian's face, cupping the side of his face afterward. "Ich liebe dich, mein liebling." Feliciano grinned widely and moved to stand up, but cried out in pain and fell back to the floor on his bum, causing Feliciano to bite his lip hard to stop from shouting, justified tears falling from his eyes. Ludwig quickly jumped off the bed and rushed to his whimpering lover, who was trying very hard not to start balling his eyes out. Carefully maneuvring one arm under Feliciano's knees and the other arm gently supporting Feliciano's upper back, Ludwig picked up his lover bridal style. Trying not to move as best as he could, the Italian wrapped his arms around the German's neck. With a layer of pink dusting his cheeks, Ludwig apologetically placed a kiss on Feliciano's forehead. Pulling back only centimeters, Ludwig moved his mouth closer to Feliciano's ear and whispered soft and caring 'shh, it's ok, shh, don't cry, Liebling. Shhh, please don't cry.' Feliciano whimpered softly but did his best not to cry.

Very slowly, Ludwig placed the Italian on the bed and went to get in on the other side. Still whimpering, Feliciano had only a few small tears rolling down his face. With a part of his heart about to break off, Ludwig gently wiped the tears away and scooted himself as close to his lover as possible without moving him On pure instinct, Feliciano lifted his head and Ludwig placed his arm underneath. It was a routine they shared since they became a couple. Taking a few deep, preparing breaths, Feliciano shut his eyes tight and quickly rolled himself onto Ludwig's chest. Surprised, Ludwig immediately wrapped his arms around his lover to prevent him from moving too much and causing more harm than good. With only a small whimper, Feliciano opened his eyes slowly and was met his cool, worried blue eyes watching him. "Are you okay?" Ludwig whispered, really hoping that the Italian wouldn't start crying because he can't stand seeing his lover cry anymore. Wiggling his bum back and forth, Feliciano leaned forward and placed a kiss on the corner of the German's mouth. "It hurts… but it's nothing I can't handle."

Ludwig did not look convinced, but moved his hand to Feliciano's lower back and spread out his fingers. The Italian once mentioned that having Ludwig's hand resting on his lower back helped make the pain ebb. "You know I can't stand seeing you in pain…" Purring happily from the warm hand resting on his lower back, Feliciano leaned in and kissed Ludwig full on the lips. "Some types of pain are worth it, Luddy. I can handle it." Chuckling at the light blush that graced the German's face, Feliciano kissed Ludwig again. "Now lets get some sleep, yeah?" Very gently, Ludwig put his un-busy hand under Feliciano's chin and kissed him lovingly. Barely pulling back, Ludwig whispered, "If at any point the pain becomes too much, wake me up and I'll take care of you," the German placed another kiss on the Italian's lips, "I promise."

Feliciano hummed. "Okay, Ludwig. *yawn* Ti amo."

"Und Ich liebe dich, Feliciano."

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><p>I can't believe I wrote soft-core porn. :Y<p> 


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